Professionalism is optional when you’ve got a perfectly absurd reason to call out.
Every workplace has its share of no-shows and last-minute call-outs, but Gen Z has turned skipping work into something closer to performance art. Their excuses aren’t just funny—they’re layered, creative, and delivered with so much dry sincerity you can’t help but pause and wonder if they’re serious. These aren’t tired cough-and-cold fibs or fake flat tires. They’re dramatic, sometimes philosophical, and usually sprinkled with internet culture, personal trauma, and cosmic events. The result? A whole new generation of out-of-office messages that read more like diary entries than formal requests.
What makes them funny isn’t just how over-the-top they are—it’s that they often reflect something real. A mood swing disguised as an aura shift. Burnout dressed up as Mercury retrograde. Gen Z isn’t just dodging work. They’re signaling that the grind doesn’t always win—and sometimes, the vibe really is off. The best part? They’re usually self-aware about it. It’s not laziness; it’s existential honesty delivered in meme format. These 13 ridiculous and strangely relatable excuses prove that skipping work can be weird, emotional, and occasionally brilliant—all at the same time.
1. “I need a mental health day because Mercury is in retrograde.”
Some blame stress. Others point to overwork. But Gen Z? They check the stars. If Mercury is in retrograde, it’s an all-systems-go situation for a personal day, according to Arlin Cuncic at Verywellmind. This cosmic excuse isn’t even a joke to many—it’s a trusted framework for chaos, confusion, and missed deadlines. Computers glitch, miscommunications multiply, and everyone’s energy feels cursed. So instead of fighting the planetary current, they log off, cancel meetings, and retreat until the universe calms down.
There’s something kind of brilliant about it. No one wants to challenge astrology—it’s too ambiguous to argue with and too mystical to dismiss outright. Claiming a retrograde day is like waving a spiritual doctor’s note. Gen Z uses it to justify bubble baths, phone silence, and detaching from all responsibilities with confidence. And somehow, it works. The stars said no, and that’s the final word.
2. “I saw a TikTok about burnout and realized I’m too emotionally raw to work.”
It takes roughly 11 seconds of scrolling before a TikTok therapist hits you with something uncomfortably accurate. Gen Z lives in this emotional crossfire daily, where one minute they’re watching cat videos and the next they’re having a full breakdown thanks to a viral post about workplace trauma. It’s no wonder they close the app, cry for twenty minutes, and email their boss: “I need a day.”
There’s a strange honesty in it. Instead of suppressing emotion like past generations were taught to do, Gen Z lets it wash over them—then calls in sad. It’s not about weakness; it’s about immediate emotional awareness. If a TikTok told them their coping mechanisms are trash and their boundaries are paper-thin, they believe it. And they take action. The algorithm is their therapist now, and today’s advice is: don’t go to work, as reported by Zoe Kaplan at The Forage.
3. “I had a dream that something bad would happen if I left the house today.”
If intuition speaks, Gen Z listens—especially when it happens in the form of a chaotic dream filled with broken elevators, exes, and falling teeth. They don’t need to understand the symbolism. All they know is that it felt bad, the vibes are off, and going outside might tip the balance into disaster territory. So instead of risking it, they stay home.
It’s the kind of excuse that’s too weird to question, as stated by Rikki Schlott at NY Post. You can’t argue with dreams. And if the dream included a coworker turning into a sea monster during a Zoom meeting, then maybe it’s best to take the hint. There’s something strangely empowering about trusting your subconscious over your schedule. If the dream said don’t go, they’re not going. No further questions.
4. “My pet is having an emotional crisis and needs emotional support.”
This isn’t about vet visits or actual illness. This is about vibes. Maybe their cat made extended eye contact. Maybe the dog sighed dramatically and stared into the void. Maybe their gecko hasn’t moved in two days and it’s causing real concern. Whatever the signal, Gen Z interprets it as a cry for help—and they’re answering with PTO.
The pet isn’t sick. It’s just emotionally fragile. And that means canceling plans, staying in bed, and whispering affirmations to a lizard. It might sound absurd, but for Gen Z, this level of devotion is normal. Their pets are emotional support animals even when they’re not certified. And if that means skipping work to babysit a moody goldfish, so be it.
5. “I can’t come in. My ex posted something cryptic and I need to spiral.”
The digital age brings emotional chaos in bite-sized pieces, and nothing hits harder than a cryptic ex post. A blurry sunset with vague lyrics? A mirror selfie with a one-word caption? It’s a message. Maybe. Probably. Either way, it derails the day. Gen Z doesn’t pretend to be above it. They lean in—with full permission to unravel.
There’s no shame in it, either. They don’t fake stomach bugs or claim food poisoning. They send a message saying, “Not okay today.” Then they stalk, overthink, rewatch old stories, and journal like they’re living inside a breakup montage. To some, it’s ridiculous. To them, it’s healing. Emotional damage deserves PTO too.
6. “I accidentally dyed my hair the wrong color and can’t be perceived like this.”
Hair dye is a risky business, and Gen Z knows the stakes are high. One bad batch, one botched tutorial, and suddenly they’re facing the world with patchy green instead of dreamy lavender. The only solution? Immediate withdrawal from society. Work included.
They’re not being shallow—they’re in crisis. Hair is identity, mood, and mental state rolled into one. If it’s wrong, they’re wrong. There will be no showing up for meetings looking like an anime villain unless it was intentional. Until the toner sets or the dye fades, they’re off the grid with a hat pulled low.
7. “I’m emotionally exhausted from pretending to like my job yesterday.”
Pushing through a long day of pretending to be upbeat in team huddles and Slack threads is its own kind of burnout. Gen Z doesn’t fake it for long. If they spent all of yesterday being peppy, helpful, and emotionally available, they’re drained. Today is about recovery.
They don’t owe anyone performance energy every day of the week. And when they reach the limit, they hit pause. No email. No “circling back.” Just silence and a text that says, “I used all my fake joy yesterday. I’ll be back when it reboots.” Is it cheeky? Yes. But it’s also deeply relatable.
8. “I matched with my manager’s cousin on Tinder and now I can’t face anyone.”
Modern dating is chaotic enough without it spilling into your job. But once you’ve swiped right on someone with a familiar last name and then confirmed it’s your boss’s cousin? That’s a crisis. Gen Z doesn’t attempt to power through. They log off.
It’s not just awkward—it’s a full-body cringe. They’re not ready to explain it, laugh it off, or even look you in the eye. They need space to delete the app, cleanse their digital footprint, and figure out how to avoid the next company barbecue. Until then, they’re lying low and avoiding all LinkedIn activity.
9. “I started crying on public transit and now I need to reevaluate everything.”
Crying in public is a spiritual experience. It hits different when it’s on a bus, train, or in the back of a rideshare while a podcast plays in the background. Gen Z doesn’t shake it off—they embrace the unraveling and head straight home to process.
Work can wait. When the tears come unexpectedly, it means something’s been bubbling for a while. Rather than slap on a smile, they choose honesty. They’ll be in bed, under a blanket, texting friends and reevaluating their entire life path. Maybe it’s dramatic. Maybe it’s just self-care in its rawest form.
10. “I can’t make it in. My manifestation didn’t work.”
They did everything right—the vision board, the affirmations, the new moon ritual. But when the thing they wished for didn’t show up? It’s emotionally crushing. Gen Z sees this as a sign to stop, rest, and try again tomorrow after realigning their frequency.
It’s not laziness—it’s spiritual exhaustion. They need time to re-center, recharge, and maybe burn some sage over their laptop. There’s a weird kind of clarity in saying, “I believed in the magic, and it failed me.” Today’s for regrouping. The dream might not be dead, but it definitely needs a nap.
11. “My vibe’s off and I refuse to subject others to it.”
You know when everything feels just slightly… wrong? The energy’s sour, the thoughts are jumbled, and nothing makes sense? Gen Z calls that a vibe shift, and when it hits, they remove themselves before spreading the weirdness to everyone else.
It’s a courtesy, really. They’re not ghosting—they’re doing damage control. No one benefits from an off-vibe coworker sitting in the Zoom call with dead eyes and sarcasm dialed to eleven. So they sign off, recalibrate, and rejoin once the glitchy energy has passed. Honestly, it’s kind of considerate.
12. “I just realized I hate capitalism and need to lie down.”
Sometimes it just hits—usually mid-scroll or after reading a LinkedIn post about “grind culture.” The weight of the system, the performative productivity, the never-ending metrics—it all becomes too much. Gen Z doesn’t push through. They collapse under it and text: “I can’t today.”
They’re not quitting. They’re just pausing. Sometimes the absurdity of working 40 hours a week for a vague promise of future comfort becomes overwhelming. So they take a breath, remind themselves they’re not alone, and binge-watch videos about van life. Tomorrow, they’ll rejoin the system. Today, they rebel with a nap.
13. “My aura feels crunchy and I don’t want to spread it.”
This is the ultimate catch-all excuse. No explanation, no backstory—just a vague sense that their energy is off and they don’t want to infect the group chat. Gen Z trusts their intuition, and if their aura feels crunchy, they know better than to show up and fake it.
Crunchy aura days are for recharging, not pushing through. They light candles, cancel plans, and let their nervous system untangle itself without guilt. There’s no point pretending they’re fine when their spirit says otherwise. When the aura clears, they’ll be back—brighter, sharper, and slightly more hydrated.