The numbers don’t always slip first—sometimes the judgment does.
Most financial mistakes seem harmless at first—forgotten bills, odd purchases, or confusion over online banking. But when they start stacking up, it’s hard not to wonder if there’s something deeper going on. For many adult children watching aging parents navigate money, small changes in financial behavior may be the first red flags of cognitive trouble.
These aren’t just budgeting blunders. They’re often the subtle clues that something’s shifting mentally, long before any diagnosis appears on paper.
1. They forget to pay essential monthly bills.
Everyone misses a due date once in a while, but when a parent who once ran the household like a spreadsheet begins skipping power bills, mortgage payments, or health insurance premiums, it’s not just forgetfulness—it’s a shift in executive functioning. This kind of oversight affects more than finances; it can disrupt healthcare, credit ratings, and basic safety. When reminders, autopay setups, or visible notes still don’t keep things on track, it’s often a deeper cognitive lapse hiding behind a simple task.
2. They start making large donations to questionable charities.
Boomer parents are generous by nature, but when they start giving hundreds or thousands of dollars to obscure causes or overly aggressive solicitors, it’s time to raise an eyebrow. Cognitive decline often reduces skepticism and impulse control. They may feel flattered by attention or convinced by emotional pitches. The problem isn’t the giving—it’s the pattern. When it becomes frequent, uncharacteristic, or financially draining, it could indicate declining judgment wrapped in good intentions.
3. They suddenly make big purchases they don’t need.
It’s one thing to treat yourself. It’s another to buy a second elliptical or pay full price for a product they already own—twice. When large purchases show up out of the blue, with no practical use or clear explanation, it often reflects difficulty with planning or impulse control. These decisions can seem quirky or even funny at first, but they’re sometimes a red flag for deeper cognitive issues, especially when they disrupt savings or create conflict with family members who notice.
4. They fall for obvious scams or phishing attempts.
Scammers prey on everyone, but aging adults with early cognitive decline are prime targets. If your parent has always been cautious but suddenly shares personal information, clicks suspicious links, or sends gift cards to strangers, it’s more than naivety—it’s deteriorating judgment. Their internal red flags don’t go off the way they used to. Trust replaces caution. And once they’ve been duped once, they’re often targeted again, turning an embarrassing mistake into a repeated vulnerability.
5. They withdraw large amounts of cash without explanation.
When your mom or dad begins taking out unusual sums of cash and can’t explain why, it’s more than odd—it’s potentially dangerous. Whether they’re hiding it, forgetting where they placed it, or simply repeating old habits without reason, large withdrawals can signal memory issues or confusion around financial safety. It’s particularly concerning if they’re avoiding online banking or ATMs they used to use comfortably. The behavior can also open the door to elder abuse if others notice the pattern.
6. They forget how to use familiar banking tools.
If your parent suddenly struggles with basic banking—using their debit card, accessing online statements, or reconciling a check register they’ve balanced for decades—it may not just be frustration with new tech. These tasks require memory, attention, and planning skills, all of which are impacted early in cognitive decline. Repeated calls to the bank or complaints about being “locked out” of accounts often reveal a bigger struggle behind the scenes.
7. They neglect to open or respond to financial mail.
Piles of unopened mail on the kitchen counter aren’t just messy—they’re telling. Boomer parents who once opened every bill on time may now ignore letters from their bank, insurance company, or tax authority. This isn’t laziness or protest. It’s often confusion, avoidance, or an inability to prioritize what’s important. They may feel overwhelmed or unable to process what used to be routine, leading to missed payments, lapsed policies, and mounting stress they won’t admit to anyone.
8. They start giving money to people they barely know.
A casual friendship with a neighbor or online acquaintance can turn into financial generosity that feels out of character. If your parent starts writing checks to someone they just met or insists on helping someone with vague problems, it’s time to pause. These aren’t always scams—sometimes it’s just impaired discernment. Cognitive changes can make people overly trusting or too eager to feel useful. When money leaves their account easily and without scrutiny, their independence may be at risk.
9. They change long-standing financial habits suddenly.
If your parent has always been thrifty and suddenly begins spending like a college freshman with a new credit card, something’s probably up. Cognitive decline can shift priorities or create a sense of urgency to “enjoy life now,” but these decisions often come without context or long-term planning. The reverse can also be true—someone who always spent freely may suddenly become obsessed with hoarding every penny. Either swing may signal something deeper than a personality quirk.
10. They have trouble following simple financial conversations.
When it’s time to talk about retirement, taxes, or insurance, and your parent seems lost in the weeds or easily overwhelmed, it could be more than disinterest. Difficulty following conversations that used to be second nature is often an early sign of memory or processing issues. They may ask the same question multiple times, forget key details, or nod along while clearly disengaged. If the money talk feels like walking through fog, it’s time to pay attention.
11. They misplace money and blame others.
Misplacing a wallet or forgetting where they stashed cash is normal once in a while. But when your parent insists someone stole from them—especially if it happens repeatedly—it might not be paranoia. It could be confusion, compounded by memory loss and fear. As cognitive abilities decline, even small mistakes feel threatening. They may not remember taking the money out or moving it and fill in the blanks with suspicion. This behavior often reflects anxiety masking memory gaps.
12. They insist everything is fine while bills go unpaid.
Denial can be loud, especially when independence is at stake. If your parent brushes off concerns, insists they’re handling everything, but the lights get shut off or collection notices arrive, the gap between confidence and reality is widening. It’s not always about pride—it’s sometimes about unawareness. They truly believe they’ve got it under control, even when the numbers say otherwise. This disconnect can be one of the most challenging signs of cognitive decline to face as a family.